A Glimpse at the Future

I can already see it—the future teenage version of my girls, just based on how they are at carpool at 4 and 6 years old.

Jessica is the one who pulls into carpool, windows down, head out, waving enthusiastically at her friends. “Mom, look! It’s Ellie, and there’s Sicily!” she’ll shout, all excited to see her crew. Before she gets out of the car, she lays her dead on my shoulder and says “Love you.” I give her my “Love you’s, Have a great day’s, and see you in a bit’s.” She steps out of the car, grabs her backpack, and waves as she walks away from the car. If she’s got extra things to carry, she’ll ask if I can park and walk her into class, always in the mood for one last moment of closeness before diving into her day. She’s my little social butterfly, full of energy, always wanting to connect.

Then there’s Jenna. Same car, but a whole different vibe. She wants the windows down, head out just like Jessica, but her version is a little less “Mom, look!” and a little more “I’m doing my own thing.” She yells and waves to her friends, but me? Well, I no longer exist. I’ll ask, “Who’s that?” trying to get her attention. Silence. I ask again, louder. Slowly, she’ll turn her head, give me a look—eyebrows furrowed, like she’s mentally filing away the fact that I’m interrupting her “coolness”—and then just as slowly, she turns back to the window and picks up exactly where she left off.

When we pull up and stop, the ritual is the same. A quick, almost robotic “Bye, Mom” escapes her lips, and she’s out of the car and heading straight for the doors with zero look-backs, no waves. Meanwhile, I’m over here tossing out all the “I love you’s” and “Have a great day’s,” sending them into the world like a proud, sentimental mom.

It’s so funny, because even at this young age, I can already see it. Jessica, my social, sweet, open-hearted one, and Jenna, my independent, cool, no-nonsense one. I can only imagine how much more exaggerated these little glimpses will get as they grow. Jessica’s going to be the one in high school waving at everyone in the hallway, and Jenna? She’s probably going to be the one breezing past me with a barely-there glance, lost in her own world with headphones on, not even hearing my “I love you” as she rushes off to her next adventure.

And you know what? I love them both fiercely for exactly who they are.